I love going to the movies. I’m a huge film buff, especially the action/adventure/comedy genres. So, naturally I had high hopes this summer season with some of my favorites movies returning with sequels.

Again, I said I HAD high hopes. So far the scorecard for the season isn’t very good.

SPIDERMAN 3
I was incredibly disappointed with Spiderman 3. I don’t think it was entirely “the suck” as others have written, but it probably wasn’t far off. I kinda felt like I was watching a combination of action movie, chick flick and afterschool special that was more interested in flashy (and pointless) action sequences and silly one liners. Even Stan Lee had to preach at me with his only line in the film “Wow, I guess one man can make a difference.”

I wanted to see a kick-ass action flick featuring one of my favorite comic book superheroes. Instead I got to see a whiny Peter Parker, a jealous Mary Jane, and Aunt May filling in for my moral compass. I won’t pay to see it in the dollar theatre, I won’t buy it when it comes out on DVD, and I plan to never watch it again. Maybe, just maybe it is “the suck.”

SHREK 3
I saw Shrek 3 last night. The animation was amazing – a visual feast! It was only missing one thing… comedy. After sitting in the theater for about 30 minutes, I realized that I wasn’t laughing at all. I began thinking that maybe it was just me – maybe I just wasn’t INTO it. So I started watching the audience. They weren’t laughing either. I started checking the time every time I laughed, and I can definitely say there was a very funny part at roughly an hour into the movie, and another one about at about hour and 15 minutes in. Yeah, there were some other funny bits but most of them were shown on the commercials.

Also, this was another movie that wanted to preach at me. It just wasn’t all that funny seeing Shrek fret over being a father, Arthur being scared of taking the throne, and all of the villains finding their inner good. Overall, it wasn’t a baaaad movie, it just wasn’t very funny, which is the ONLY reason I went to see it.

A quick side note, if you have a daughter that loves the Disney princesses, this might not be the best movie to take her to. The princess are all portrayed as a bunch of whiny, backstabbing bitches without much in the way of brains. Several of them are redeemed towards the end of the movie though.

I really hope “Pirates of the Carribean 3” doesn’t leave me wanting more.

The big monkey dies at the end.

When I was a kid, I used to keep all of our old TV Guides. Eventually, I threw them all away, but there was one in particular that I kept for a long time. It had a full page ad for a live action Superhero show. I remember the ad listed FLASH, CAPTAIN MARVEL and a bunch of others. I REALLY wanted to see the show, but it wasn’t on any of the 5 channels that we had.

For several years, I kept waiting for the show to come on again. There were no VCR’s or Blockbuster vidoes back then, so if there was a show you wanted to see you just had to wait for it to be replayed.

Eventually I gave up and even threw away that old TV Guide. Once I threw it out I lost all evidence it even existed. I was beginning to think I had imagined the whole thing – until tonight when I stumbled across this guy’s article on moviepoopshoot.com. I found it on IMDB too. Apparently, it sucked really really bad.

Man I love the Internet.